Comic skits February 23. Scenarios for Defender of the Fatherland Day ★ (February 23). Props and decorations of the festive hall
Defenders of Rus' (or “Three, even Four Heroes”)
(scenario for a separate performance for a class hour, for a concert for Victory Day, for Defender of the Fatherland Day)
Methodological justification:
I consider it most correct to offer my colleagues - creative teachers and parents of schoolchildren - not huge scripts for entire holidays or concerts, but similar mini-scripts for individual performances, based on the fact that:
- texts of a smaller volume in the time pressure of teaching and parental life are easier to get acquainted with (and assimilate their content);
- a competent (and over time, sooner or later, we will all be like this) screenwriter (or director) is looking for content to realize his idea, looking for and training co-implementers.
The proposed text may work here in Russia (after all, “where you were born, it worked there”) class teachers, directors of school holidays(they often have to become head teachers for educational work), and also - creative parents, arranging home performances with children (and not just family scenes) and workers of summer children's health camps.
The text is quite easy to understand teenagers(up to Mitrofanushki), and even developed 3rd and 4th graders, but still recommended schoolchildren in grades 5–9(it is the most difficult thing to select the repertoire for this age, trying to interest the children, to find a theme and language that would become competitive with pop lightness, given its often low standard).
Including a performance based on the proposed text in a concert or class hour, dear adults, note on every detail (costume, hairstyle, facial expressions, intonation of reading or recitation in the rhythm of a sounding orchestral phonogram - let’s add to Chekhov’s wish “Everything in a person should be... not only beautiful, but also sincere,” and especially when addressing a patriotic theme).
Target– to educate schoolchildren (both spectators and listeners and performers of the 4 proposed roles) with a sense of patriotism.
Tasks:
- to form (or to update) historical knowledge (names and exploits of people who have become a symbol of Russia’s military glory and love for their country);
- using the example of Russian folklore (Russian folk song “Stenka Razin”) to introduce young people to the traditions of Russian culture;
- present to schoolchildren examples of decent humor (different from the primitive or vulgar that has filled the stage and TV);
- provide participants with the opportunity to demonstrate their creative (actor, make-up artist, costume designer, sound engineer, etc.) talents.
The number is being performed to the tune of the Russian folk song “Stenka Razin”(“Because of the island to the core”; which is important to do, given the sad situation with real, and not popular Russian folklore, which includes, talented and appropriate in the context of the plot of the fairy tale, E. Leonov’s performance of this song in the cartoon “The Magic Ring” ").
As a musical introduction that creates a heroic, heroic atmosphere before the start of the number, it is better to use the beginning of the 1st movement of A. Borodin’s “Heroic” Symphony or the 1st movement of “Symphony” in G minor by Vas. Kalinnikov (in this case, in the prologue the main, powerful theme is heard, and in the epilogue - in the moment after the 4 verses have been spoken - a secondary, lyrical part).
Instead of an illustration!:
This song adaptation, like the subsequent ones (and, no matter how you insist, they will be), is fundamentally not accompanied by ANY illustration, so that each reader has his own, UNIQUE imagination (for this idea the author himself and those who supported him, handed over two “Nickies” at once).
1st verse(Kutuzov sings and wheezes; eye patch):
Sasha Nevsky bequeathed to us:
“Who will come to Rus' with a sword,
Not with football - but with sharp, vile -
He will fall by the sword."
I, Field Marshal Prince Kutuzov,
I invite everyone to Moscow,
But who without asking (I'm talking about the French)
I'll tear up the cocked hat.
2nd verse) Peter I (the role is played, that is, the one who knows how to stand on stilts, or a person who has signs of lankyness, sings and yells):
I am Peter, who is the First,
Open the door, Europe!
What, they closed? It's nerves,
But don't play the fool here.
No problem, let’s wave out the window,
Move over, brother Swede!
There is a little strength in Russia,
And Lomonosov, eh! and a bear!
3rd verse(Marshal Zhukov, pathetically and sincerely):
Well, I’m Georgy Zhukov,
(continues with Kutuzov and Peter I) Everyone is glad who recognizes us...
(Zhukov alone again) But not the one who went to Berlin,
He ran away from us with his tail between his legs.
4th verse, composed of saved letters; We even entrust the performance to an unsightly boy whose name consists of 1–4 syllables):
I’m Kolya (I’m Peter; I’m Seryoga; Immanuel, etc.), well, if necessary,
And I study in forty-seventh *
.
(all in chorus) But if necessary, let’s stand together
We are for Rus', for our city!
*
“... in the 47th”, since this is the number of the school where the author of the words works; but without any problems, *2nd, *6th, -*8th will rhyme in the same way.
For op-amps with numbers ending in 1, 3, 4, 5, 9, you can offer the following option:
... And I study in the **th place.
But if necessary, we will stand together
For you, O my Rus'!
The following scene can be used with equal success both as part of a school event and for a corporate party.
Sketch for February 23 “How to get out of the army”
There is a table on the stage with a sign on it
[Agency "Skip away from the army"]
Leading: In the modern world, more and more conscripts are trying to find a way to avoid military service. For every conscript who contacts us, we will find a decent way to get out of the army.
Method No. 1
At the military registration and enlistment office, conscripts are sitting at the ophthalmologist's office. The first conscript enters the office.
Doctor: Do you see the top line?
Conscript: I see!
Doctor: And the second?
Conscript: I see!
Doctor: Do you see the next one even lower?
Conscript: No!
Doctor: So you’ll become a sniper! Next come in!
The second conscript enters.
Doctor: Do you see the top line, young man?
Conscript: I see!
Doctor: And lower?
Conscript: No, I don’t see it!
Doctor: So you are going to serve in the Marine Navy. Next one, come in!
The third conscript enters.
Doctor: Do you see the top line?
Conscript: No, doctor, I don’t see it!
Doctor: How cunning. You will go to serve in intelligence!
Leading: Yes, not a very good example. Well, then we offer another, more reliable way to avoid service.
Method No. 2
Two conscripts are sitting at the door of the medical commission. One is calm, the other is praying. The first one asks:
-Why are you praying like that?
“I don’t want to go into the army, I’m afraid.”
- And I know how to help you!
“Let me knock out your front teeth now, and then no one will take you into the army!”
— (uncertain) Well, if it definitely helps... go ahead.
(The first conscript swings and imitates a blow to the face. The second covers his face with his hands and goes to the doctor. During this time, he must cover his front teeth with a piece of black paper. After a while, the conscript leaves the doctor’s office, cheerful, smiling with his “toothless” mouth.)
- Well, you didn’t take it? I told you...
— (interrupts, speaks with a lisp) Nope, they didn’t get it! I have flat feet!
Leading: The method is somewhat bloodthirsty, well, what lengths do our conscripts sometimes refuse to go to in order to avoid the army.
Method No. 3
The conscript sits in the neurologist’s office and says:
“It’s all Santa Claus’s fault, he mixed everything up.” Fifteen years ago I asked him to give me a military uniform for the New Year. And just now I received it.
Psychiatrist At this time he writes something. Then he asks
— Do you have mental disorders?
Conscript: (scared) - N-no.
The psychiatrist jumps up sharply and, leaning towards the conscript, shouts:
- What if I find it!!!
Leading: And these are not all the options that our agency is ready to offer to everyone...
(All the conscripts enter and push the presenter off the stage by the collar. The sign with the inscription is thrown out after him)
About the beloved army
Knows old and young.
And she's invincible
Today everyone is happy.
There are soldiers in the army
Tankers, sailors
All the strong guys
They are not afraid of enemies!
And we are ready to serve too,
Become defenders of the country.
Day and night my native land
Protecting from war!
Sketch for February 23 at the “Three Heroes” school
In a glorious city...
Once upon a time we lived, we didn’t grieve
Three heroes.
Every kid here knows them,
He knows, you and I know.
(three heroes come on stage
Ilya Muromets:
Yes, life is good now
Agree with me, Alyosha.
There is peace and grace in the world,
Our army is resting.
Alesha Popovich:
Our strength is with us,
Brave little friend.
Just let the enemy poke his nose in
Let's show him what and how!
Nikitich:
So that people sleep sweetly,
We will guard the world
Stand by day and stand by night,
Let there be grace in the country.
Ilya Muromets:
Rus' has always been strong
Impregnable like a wall!
Proud of his army
Our strong country.
Alesha Popovich:
Our swords are ready
We’ll lie down for Rus', they’ll just say.
Nikitich:
Ilya Muromets:
And for the young boys
Our parting instructions.
You must serve in the army
This is your duty, not an order!
Sketch for February 23rd for schoolchildren
Princess 1: Oh, and boring! Nothing interesting, nothing to do at all.
Princess 2: Well, let's come up with something like that!
3 princess: For example?
Princess 2: For example, let’s declare war on someone.
Princess 1: Oh, I beg you! War is not in fashion now!
Princess 2: Maybe we can find some grooms for ourselves?
Princess 1: Interesting, where are you going to look for them?
Princess 3: I don’t need just any groom. I want strong, strong, smart, worthy!
Princess 1: Yes, and I wouldn’t refuse such a thing, if they exist at all.
Princess 2: Look around! Look how many of them got divorced, suitors! Will we really not be able to find anyone worthy in our kingdom?
Princess 1: I propose to organize a competition between the stronger sex. Let's test their strength and dexterity, ingenuity and erudition. We will choose the best as grooms.
Princess 2: Let's go! Herald! ( A herald enters with a scroll. One of the princesses says something to him quietly, he pretends to write it down. After this, he goes to the middle of the stage, unrolls the scroll and reads loudly):
Listen! Listen!
And don't say you didn't hear!
The entire male population needs
Appear at the royal palace
To participate in competitions!
The winner will receive a worthy prize and a royal dinner!
(After this announcement, the participating guys go up to the stage.)
Humorous skit on February 23 for schoolchildren “Recruits”
(Part of the profit included recruits. The ensign lined everyone up)
Ensign: Yes, youngster! Come on, hurry up and line up! Stop talking! Look up to me! Attention! Leave it alone! Be equal! Attention!
(While the ensign is talking, he constantly walks along the line. Finally he stops near one of the recruits)
Ensign: Explain to me, soldier. Why did you join the army?
Soldier: I want to defend my Motherland.
Ensigns K: Right, what else?
Soldier: Service will make me strong and strong!
Ensign: You're right.
Soldier: And in general, no one asked my consent!
(The ensign frowns and moves away from the soldier, stopping in front of the line)
Ensign: Well, let's get acquainted! Ivanov!
Ensign: Petrov!
Ensign: Sidorov!
Prapor: What are you, brothers?
- No way, namesakes!
Private 1: Smirnov. Education: eighth grade.
Private 2: Zaitsev, secondary special education.
Private 3: Novikov, Moscow State University.
Ensign: What? What?
Private 3: MSU...
Ensign: Why are you all mooing there? Do you even know how to write?
Private 3: (shrugs) I can...
Ensign: Which of you knows how to cook, step forward!
(one soldier steps forward)
Ensign: - You will be a cook! Have you ever had to cook in large cauldrons?
Ensign: And what did you cook?
- Asphalt!
Ensign continues moving along the line.
Ensign: Why is the belt loose? What are you, Rambaud, or what? And you, private, why are you spinning around like a fly on a moped?
(Stops next to another recruit)
Ensign: What's wrong with your hand?
Private: And this blood was taken from a finger.
Ensign: Why is your arm in a cast?
Private: But I didn’t give...
A latecomer runs in.
Ensign: Where have you been?
Private. In the toilet.
Ensign: You should also go to the theater! Now remember: at the command “Stand!” everyone must immediately take their place in the ranks. Most of all I dislike late people!
Sidorov: Is there really such a word?
Ensign: I see, comrade soldier, you are too smart!
Sidorov: Who am I?
Ensign: Well, isn't it me?! Consider that I don't like late people!
(Ensignstops in front of one of the recruits who is missing an arm)
Ensign: How about you?! Where did you lose your hand?
Soldier: They tore it off... when they dragged it here...
Where should the headdress be worn? On the head. Otherwise, you can get meningitis. Meningitis is a very terrible disease. After it they either die or become fools. My brother and I were sick: my brother died, and I was lucky.
Private: Comrade warrant officer, can I ask...
Ensign (interrupts): Well, why bother! Then ask. And now, Rota! Left! Step-march! One, two! (everyone leaves the stage to the sound of a march)
Sketch for February 23 for preschool children
Small nursery rhymes about dad.
My dad is the best
He is kind, a little strict.
Works as a driver
Traveled all the roads.
Misha:
Not true, best dad
Of course I have!
He is affectionate and nice
He gave me a horse!
Lisa:
My dad is not a driver
He catches bandits at night.
My dad is a policeman
He is very, very brave!
Kolya:
And mine comes in the evening,
He hugs me.
My dad is the best
He reads fairy tales to me.
My dad is the best!
He is a doctor, he heals people.
Playing games with me
Spends the whole evening!
Dasha:
Without a doubt
My dad is the best.
He makes his own jam,
He gives flowers to my mother and me!
Kostya:
My dad is the best in the world
He is smart, the most honest.
My dad is a hero to me
And there is no more wonderful one!
Today is an important occasion
And there is an opportunity
Tell you, you are daddy
Together: The best in the world!
In addition to the hackneyed traditional congratulations and gifts, theatrical performances come in handy as a surprise or an unusual capper to the competition program. These scenes will fit perfectly into any holiday scenario on February 23rd.
Do you want to learn how to evaluate students, how to effectively work on mistakes, about reflection and self-reflection? Pre-register for the webinar and we will notify you of the date.
The number of listeners is limited! Hurry up to register.
Modern scenes for February 23rd for a corporate party from women. Funny, new for men!
Well, not much time is left for the fair half of humanity to prepare for February 23rd. But men expect a holiday and a good mood from their colleagues and girlfriends. And here the girls really can’t lose face in the dirt. And if so, then here are new sketches for February 23rd for a corporate party from women to make it fun. Funny and amusing scenes will help you congratulate your male colleagues on Defender of the Fatherland Day and make this evening unique and unlike anything else.
The first scene is a musical congratulation.
What's a holiday without a song?! And on the occasion of February 23, we need to perform beautiful, funny, but military and festive songs.
For this scene, the girls must learn some kind of dance, for example, change the usual soldier’s march to something bright and danceable. After all, the song is such that you want to march. The song itself is a reworked song based on the tune - a soldier has a day off. Our version of the song says that today is a holiday for men and girls dress up in honor of the holiday. So you can turn the march into how girls put on makeup and dress beautifully.
Here are the lyrics of the remade song:
The second scene is congratulations from famous women.
What man doesn’t dream of being approached by some famous woman? In this scene, all the secret desires of your men will come true.
To make this scene bright and funny, you need to rehearse and find outfits for the characters. And the images here are as follows: Venus, Vasilisa Krassa, Scheherazade, Isolde and Pamela Anderson. These are the girls who decided to congratulate the men in honor of Defender of the Fatherland Day. You girls will have to find outfits for their images and select candidates who will cope with the role. And then everything is simple - after the host’s words, the girls take turns coming out and giving their speech. The men admire and fall to the floor in amazement.
Text for the scene:
Scene three - girls discuss gifts for men.
In this scene, three girls sit and discuss what to give men on February 23rd. During the discussion, they come to the point that the best gift for them would be love! Do you agree with this?
Watch the video skit, memorize it and do the same performance for your men:
Scene four - girls are drafted into the army
This is a fictional scene, because in our country girls are not drafted into the army. But in honor of February 23, we will show men how real girls are chosen to serve in the army!
Military registration and enlistment office. There is a table. A nurse sits nearby. On the other side of the nurse are girls who are being drafted into the army. The doctor runs in and says to the nurse:
- Lyuba, what happened?! Why was I called to work so urgently?
Lyuba:
- urgently, because a new draft has been announced. And they called me - it was Monday, it was still a working day.
Doctor:
- ah, because of this or what? So this is nonsense. Now we will quickly send everyone to the army. (addresses conscripts) Do you want to join the army? You are all healthy!
The conscripts shout indignantly:
- no, we don’t want to, we are unfit, we are sick.
Doctor:
- who is unfit there? Come on, give me your medical history here.
The doctor takes a medical history from one conscript, lifts it up and looks at it. Speaks:
- I can not see anything.
Then he puts the story aside, and a thousand rubles remain in his hand, which he also holds up to the light and says:
- ah, now I see, I see that you are all glowing with happiness, since you are not fit for the army. This is confirmed by three zeros.
The conscript leaves the stage with joyful cries.
Doctor:
- so, who else is there with us? Ah, it’s you, my soul! Come here. Look (shows a photograph), what do you see there?
Conscript:
- I see love and two people in love.
Doctor:
- look, what an imagination. And I see my son, my boy, who shows promise and enters a higher educational institution! And here you are, who interferes with his life. That's it, it's decided - you are fit to serve on a submarine!
Conscript:
- maybe in a submarine after all. And not on her?!
Doctor:
Everyone will serve in a submarine, and you on a submarine1 will know. How to ruin a child's life.
Doctor addressing nurse:
- Or maybe all of them to the navy, for three years?
Conscripts in chorus:
- no, we can’t, we all have love!
Doctor:
Everyone has? Is everyone in love? Then you don’t need to come to me, you should go to a venereologist first. Check your love...
The conscripts leave the stage. Doctor:
- dear men, remember that serving is not just a year, two or three being away from home. This is a year, two or three years to protect us, girls who are waiting for you and believe in love! Happy holiday to you!
Characters:
HOST.
Girls:
SMART. Nerd girl. Wear glasses. He prefers science to marriage.
AMBALKA. Tall, broad-shouldered. Speaks in a deep voice.
BLONDE. No comments needed. The only clarification: she wears a bust size of 4.
WARRANT. Female ensign. There are no other differences.
TOLYAN. Ambalka's groom. True, Ambalka herself thinks so. Tolyan has his own opinion on this matter, but he prefers to keep it to himself. Moreover, he is still intact.
SVETKA. Ambalka's friend and Tolyan's secret love.
RELATIVES. Extras in unlimited quantities.
HOST. Good evening, dear friends! The holiday that has brought us all together in this hall today is truly a national holiday. Fatherland - what could be more expensive for every person, citizen of the country. Defender of the Fatherland Day is one of our favorite holidays, a holiday of our beloved and dear men. And those who are sitting in this hall now, and those who at these moments are carrying out their difficult but honorable service!
SMART (comes out from behind the scenes). Listen, (name), I just stood backstage, and this is what I thought. So what happens, for whom is it a holiday, and for whom is it a service?
Ambalka comes onto the stage - slowly, with a heavy gait, and waddles.
AMBALKA. What is the market about, girls? Who decided to slant here?
SMART. Nobody. We talked about the fact that many men fulfill their military duty on this holiday.
AMBALKA. Right! They didn’t want to do the marital duty, so now let them do the military duty! (Into the hall). Am I right? Moreover, it was necessary to mow during the medical examination.
SMART. But this is unfair! I think that for one day a year, we women should take on this mission!
HOST. How is that?
SMART. We must take on the mission of defenders of the Fatherland. Just imagine: men celebrate, and women serve at this time!
Blonde runs onto the stage.
BLONDE. Oh, girls! What a beautiful word! Is the mission something like shopping?
AMBALKA. In this case, the mission is something like a casting.
BLONDE (happily claps her hands). Oh, how I like it! Mission, casting! Where is it? At a modeling agency?
BLONDE (claps her hands again). Oh, I want, I want, I want! Are there any men there?
SMART. Eat. But only on other days. And today we will be in their place! Girls, to be honest, I’m afraid of the medical examination. I have problems with my vision.
AMBALKA. Do not be afraid! The local ophthalmologist has only one letter drawn on his poster.
SMART. What letter?
AMBALKA. Letter "O". This is the font! (shows).
BLONDE. Oh girls, I'm worried. I only have a size 4 bust, do you think they will take me? And my waist has gained three millimeters, but we don’t have time for fitness anymore? Such a problem!
AMBALKA. Found the problem! Here's my problem!
BLONDE (sympathetically). So, did you get better too?
AMBALKA. Not. Neurologists are breaking their hammers on my knees. Dad only works for them.
SMART (thoughtfully). Girls, there is hazing in the army...
AMBALKA. Relax. When we arrive, there will be BABovshchina!
CONCERT NUMBER.
SMART. Girls, be quiet! (Takes out the phone and rings.) Mom, don't wait for me today. I'm going to serve! No, there will only be girls there. I know that I will never get married this way. You already offered me a monastery! But I have completely different goals in this life.
BLONDE (also takes out her phone). Hello, cat! Don't come after me. The girls and I are going to the army, I’ll be back late. Well, why did you immediately “follow the men”? All the men, by the way, are in your sauna today. In fact, we are going to take the rap for you! Well, that's it, smack-smack!
AMBALKA (makes a sign to someone backstage. Tolyan comes out from there dejectedly - he is short, smaller than Ambalka. He walks up to her doomedly, hugs her by the waist, presses against her. Ambalka speaks in a thick bass voice). Will you wait for me, Tolyan?
TOLYAN (speaks in a doomed tone). Lucy, how can I not wait for you. I shouldn't have asked.
AMBALKA (in a threatening tone). But I didn’t ask. I warned. See me here. I find out that Svetka accompanied you home from the corporate party, I’ll come back and kill you.
TOLYAN (looks up pleadingly). So I'll drink it!
AMBALKA (thoughtfully). It is truth too. (Looks at Tolyan again). But only up to the fence! If I find out that she was wandering into your yard, I’ll come back and kill you!
They leave the stage.
CONCERT NUMBER.
All three girls return to the stage.
SMART. Oh, girls, what kind of troops do you think they will take us into now? Personally, I would like to serve in the engineering forces. My education allows this.
AMBALKA. And I am in the Airborne Forces! My beliefs allow this!
BLONDE. Oh, girls! And I would like to serve on the border! There are only foreigners there... well, on the other side... Imagine, I’m standing at my post...
SMART. And the intruder is coming right at you!
BLONDE (enthusiastically). And he says to me: girl, what’s your name? And I told him: Angela!
AMBALKA. Give him another phone number!
SMART. That's it! (with irony) What if he’s not cute?
BLONDE (disappointed). Unsympathetic? Well, I don’t know... well, then I should probably join other troops...
CONCERT NUMBER
The girls return to the stage, but do not have time to say anything: the Ensign enters the stage. He walks along the girls, meticulously examining them.
WARRANTS. Talkers in action! Why aren't they filled? Where are the foot wraps?
SMART. By the way, foot wraps have long been abolished!
WARRANTS. Who's the smartest one here?
SMART. Conscript Ivanov!
WARRANTS. Break down! Two outfits out of order!
AMBALKA. Are we already in the army? What kind of troops?
WARRANTS. Who is the bravest one here?
AMBALKA. Petrov's conscript.
WARRANTS. Three outfits out of order!
BLONDE. Did you say something about outfits? Can I try it on?
WARRANTS. And who is our most curious?
BLONDE. Sidorov's conscript. Can I try it on?
WARRANTS. You can try on your finger to your nose. But in the army they don’t try anything on; in the army they take the word of a comrade warrant officer. Because Comrade Warrant Officer is now your mom, your dad, and your dad’s salary card!
AMBALKA (interested). What are you saying about the card? In terms of?
WARRANTS. In the sense that it is blocked.
BLONDE. What were you saying about the outfits? What brands do you have?
WARRANTS. We have three brands: mop, rag and bucket! (looks carefully at the Blonde). And, in general, what is this appearance? Why not according to the charter?
BLONDE. (looks at himself). What is it? Well, yes, it’s not a Hilfiger, it’s much more expensive...
All the girls begin to fuss: the smart one crouches down, covers her head with her hands, the Ambalka with her fists at the ready looks for the supposed danger, the Blonde takes a pose - posing as if in front of a camera.
WARRANTS. Flash on the right! (To the blonde). Who was the team? For those who are especially stupid, I repeat twice: flash on the right!
BLONDE (turns the other side). Oh, already on the right? But I keep thinking it’s on the left!
WARRANTS. What kind of carom is this that is not according to the regulations?
BLONDE. But you said it yourself - flash on the right! So the photographer is on the right! Am I turning the wrong way?
WARRANTS. You were born wrong! Four outfits out of order!
BLONDE. Oh, girls, four whole outfits! Oh, how I like it in the army!
WARRANTS. Did the service seem like honey? Well, let’s quickly answer the question without hesitation! Here's a plane flying. It's made of aluminum!
SMART. Maybe made of aluminum?
WARRANTS. Who said?
SMART. Conscript Ivanov!
WARRANTS. I fell and did three push-ups! (The smart one does three push-ups, then sits exhausted). Go ahead! The plane is carrying a nuclear bomb!
SMART (squeaks with all her might). Not nuclear, but nuclear!
WARRANTS. Who said?
SMART. Conscript Ivanov!
WARRANTS. I fell and did push-ups three more times! Go ahead! An aluminum plane drops a nuclear bomb on our unit. Your actions?
BLONDE. I need to call the cat!
AMBALKA. You need to do your legs before it goes boom!
SMART (beeps). Urgently save your comrade warrant officer!
WARRANTS. Who said?
SMART. Conscript Ivanov!
WARRANTS. Conscript Ivanov - get into formation! The rest - a forced march of ten kilometers! The first one went!
All the girls run backstage, followed by the Ensign.
CONCERT NUMBER
At any school party dedicated to the Defenders of the Fatherland Day, in addition to traditional congratulations and gifts, musical or theatrical skits are always useful as a surprise from girls or friends, as well as to make an interesting introduction to a competition program or an entertaining number.
Z collected here skits for February 23rd for schoolchildren of different ages that will fit well into the program of this holiday
1. Sketch for February 23rd for schoolchildren “Three girls under the window”
(three girls in Russian folk costumes are sitting)
Leading: Three maidens by the window[
Dreamed about it in the evening..
. 1st Maiden: I wish I could get married soon,
I'm really tired of girls!
2nd Maiden: Just for anyone
I wouldn't go out!
3rd Maiden: I would marry a businessman
Like behind a stone wall!
Mom would love her son-in-law,
But where can you get something like this?
1st Maiden: Well, I'm sure
I would marry a sailor!
And while he swam in the sea,
I would live without knowing grief!
2nd Maiden: There are no sailors these days,
This is simply a rarity!
I wish I could marry the military -
Strong, extraordinary!
I would be happy
With a guy as strong as a rock.
3rd Maiden: We're daydreaming, girls...
All the guys crushed
They could lie on the sofa
Yes, enjoy football!
Leading: Oh, these young people
All of you can't bear to get married!
May I get into the conversation?
I know where the guys are!
Not one, not two, not three...
Girls (in unison): Where is this?! Speak!!!
Leading (points to the young men sitting in the hall):
Look here:
The guys are here!
Not warriors - so what?
Everyone is stately and good-looking!
One person per sister...
1st Maiden (points to one of the guys): C'mon, I'll take it!
2nd Maiden (points to another): I liked this one!
3rd Maiden (on the third): This one made me smile!
Girls(together): All the guys are good,
Just a holiday for the soul!
Leading: Girls, you are almost right - today is a holiday, and this is a holiday of our wonderful men! Strong, brave, persistent and self-confident. Therefore, let's congratulate them from the bottom of our hearts, and the way to the hearts of men is - you know - through their stomachs! (The girls invite everyone to a tea party or banquet)
2. Sketch for younger schoolchildren “Bogatyrs”.
(perhaps this sketch will become the basis, like “Thirty-three heroes”, written for kindergarten graduates)
Leading: Do you know, of course, who defended our Rus' in ancient times, who are the heroes of Russian epics?
(Children answer).
The song “Our Heroic Strength” plays, music. A. Pakhmutova, poems by N. Dobronravov.
Ilya Muromets enters with a spear and sword. He walks around the hall and stands in the center.
Ilya Muromets:
I'm from the city, from Murom.
From the village of that Karacharov.
And my name is Ilya Muromets
(bows).
I stood for Rus' for many years and winters,
Sparing no effort and time.
So that Rus' never, for all time,
There was no one to fight or ruin.
And who remembers the names of my friends who fought with me for Mother Rus'?
(Children answer: Dobrynya Nikitich and Alyosha Popovich!)
Ilya Muromets:
That's right, here they come!
Alyosha Polovin and Dobrynya Nikitich enter to the music.
Alesha Popovich:
I am Alyosha Popovich by name, from Rostov the Great City. And my comrade - Dobrynya Nikitich!
Nikitich:
One day, Prince Vladimir of Stolno-Kyiv gathered the heroes for a feast and gave instructions.
Ilya Muromets:
I want to fight my enemies in the field.
Alesha Popovich:
I must collect tribute to the prince.
Nikitich:
And he sent me a tribute overseas to conquer.
Ilya Muromets:
To carry out all the instructions we must be strong, dexterous and courageous.
Well, brothers? Shall we show off our heroic strength?
Leading:
Don't you, heroes, look at our good fellows and beauties!
Ilya Muromets:
With pleasure.
(Children play games and competitions with the heroes).
Ilya Muromets:
So, are there any fellows among you who are ready to show off their daring? Come out together, brave ones! (call 5-10 people each to join their team).
The Bogatyrs are holding a competition “Darling Well Done”, which consists of 3 tasks:
1. The task of the participants is, without exchanging a single word or sound, to stand in a line, according to the decrease in shoe size.
2. Participants are blindfolded. Without seeing, they must line up according to height.
3. Each team depicts a functioning mechanism (for example, a car, a vacuum cleaner, a computer), and all team members must be involved.
The Bogatyri winners are awarded sweet prizes and diplomas from “Daly fellows.”
3. A skit on February 23 for high school students “The Bogatyr and the Serpent Gorynych.”
(Show the skit in costumes and in a good mood).
(Ilya Muromets is standing in thought, and the Serpent Gorynych with three heads approaches him...)
Dragon: Ilya Muromets, are you aware that our boys have a holiday today - February 23?
Ilya Muromets: You are the Gorynych boy, and I am a man - the defender of the homeland.
Dragon: Ilya, can I also stand here... with you, protect...?
Ilya Muromets: Wait until...
Dragon: It’s quiet... maybe he’ll call his enemies, but the two of us are giving them a hard time...
Ilya Muromets: Enemies are those who come on their own and do evil, and the rest are opponents...
Dragon: Ilya, you know, I became a vegetarian... now I only eat cabbage..
Ilya Muromets: And what?
Dragon: nutritious... Ilya, maybe we should go to the village, there are girls hanging out...
Ilya Muromets: I'm married...
Dragon: What do you want to be given as a gift on February 23?
Ilya Muromets: Binoculars to look at the country, to see the adversary from afar...
Dragon: And I also want binoculars...
Dragon: Look, someone is running - the enemy must be...
Ilya Muromets: No, these are eleventh grade girls running to school to congratulate their boys...
Dragon: And somehow they are running at a jump...
Ilya Muromets: It's so cold...
Dragon: Look, they're definitely enemies!!! and war paint...
Ilya Muromets: Yes, these are girls from the 10th grade, running to school, also so smart...
Dragon: Ilya, what are they doing there at school?
Ilya Muromets: Concert...
Dragon: Yes, then I’ll run and have a look too...
Ilya Muromets: Look there...
Dragon: Of course of course...
Ilya Muromets: Oh, SMC, they write, they invited me to a party, how could I not respect it... I’ll go...
(Source: tca77.narod.ru)
4. Scene
There are three girls on stage.
Girl 1: Well, what are we going to give? (everyone is thinking)
Girl 2: No, why do we have to give them something every year?!
Girl 3: They give it to us?
Girl 2: Mimosa and Alpen Gold are not a gift, but a mockery. Moreover, in our country it is “International Women’s Day”, i.e. for all women. And they have “Defender of the Fatherland Day”. Which one of them served?
Girl 1: Yes, guys are generally lucky in life. You can wear clothes and shoes until they tear, and not until a new collection appears.
Girl 3: You can also get a manicure done with your teeth for free.
Girl 2: A belly is not a reason for depression, but a sign of masculinity!
Girl 1: To calm your nerves, you don’t need to make an appointment with a psychotherapist, you just need to overhaul the carburetor.
Girl 3: If you come to work wearing something different from what you wore yesterday, everyone understands that today is your birthday.
Girl 2: You don’t know how much bread, cheese and sausage cost, but you have it all at home.
Girl 1: You can open a tin can with a knife. Then take the crumb, dip it in butter - that’s it, dinner is ready!
Girl 3: Girls, come on. That we attacked them. By the way, being a man is not only “advantages”, but also hard work.
Girl 2: For example?
Girl 3: For example, when buying sneakers, you need to choose a style so that you can go to the theater or to a birthday party. (everyone nods understandingly).
Girl 1: What are we going to do with the gift? As usual: shaving foam and lotion?
Girl 2: No, if a man has a bunch of accessories in his makeup bag, that means there’s something wrong with him, but if there’s only one toothbrush, then you’re a brutal guy. Let's give them toothbrushes.
Girl 3: And most importantly, our love (draw hearts in the air).
5. Musical scene for February 23 “How my own mother saw me off”
Characters:
Vania
Mother
Grandmother
Sister
Laptop and here is a bottle of kvass (bottle with nipple)
Mother: Don't forget to take the first aid kit with you
Come back soon as a hero.
Father: Honestly, serve everyone there by studying,
So that your family can be proud of you.
(song “Slavyanka”. Grandmother baptizes, mother cries, father hugs, sister kisses. Leaves through the hall)
6. A comic skit on February 23 at school “I need a man!”
(Baba Yaga comes to find a man - a protector)
Leading: Oh, whose grandmother are you? Have you come to your grandson's holiday?
Baba Yaga: No, I’m no one’s grandmother, I’m Baba Yaga, I came to pick up a man, you say men, so I’ll pick one for myself
Leading: Why do you need a young man? What kind of grandfather would you choose for yourself?
Baba Yaga: I need a defender, to save Gorynych from the Serpent, to give Koshchei from the gate
Leading: And who will marry you of their own free will?
Baba Yaga: Yes, why do I need a husband, I’m not looking for a husband, but a protector to protect me, I’ll tie him up and be under supervision. Otherwise, the Serpent Gorynych has already overcome, he walks around every day and says to pour him your potion, otherwise he will confuse my hut’s legs..
Leading: Baba Yaga, our guys are young and strong, they will not sit on a leash, they will break free even worse than what will happen to the Serpent Gorynych
Baba Yaga: What should I do, poor thing?
Leading: Look for a defender in overseas countries, maybe someone who is meek will come across it
Baba Yaga: But I don’t know languages, I’ve lived my entire adult life in the forest
Leading: Here's your grandmother's phrasebook in several languages ( gives a book) And regarding the Snake, we advise you to contact the police...
(leave)
Draft commission. In the corridor of the military registration and enlistment office there is a long line consisting of future defenders of the Fatherland. The line moves slowly, somewhere in the back a conversation arises between two conscripts Vasily and Eduard. Vasiliy is a simple Russian guy from the outback, and Eduard is a representative of advanced youth, the son of rich parents.Edward (addressing Vasily): Well, bro, do you think they’ll draft you into the army?
Basil: The doctor said: “Healthy as a bull!”
Edward: Have you tried “mowing”?
Basil: Yes, I mow every summer, I’m already tired of it, so I decided: it’s better to go into the army for two years and relax.
Edward: Right! I think so too! What is your name?
Basil: Vasya.
Edward: And I'm Edward. Listen, Vasya, where do you work?
Basil: Yes, I play music in the club.
Edward: Cool! I also work as a DJ in a nightclub. Who are your ancestors? I mean, what do parents do?
Basil: Father is a foreman.
Edward: Brigadier? My father also has his own team. Listen, who does he go under?
Basil: Under the chairman.
Edward: I have never heard of such an authority. Listen, I still have a brother.
Basil: And I have one, he grazes cows and heifers.
Edward: What are you talking about? My brother also herds heifers on Tverskaya. How are you doing on the personal front? Dude, I mean, do you have a mare?
Basil: Eat! Only she can barely walk lately.
Edward; Why?
Basil: Yes, I drove her! And recently he beat me with a whip.
Edward: Well, you're a maniac! Why didn’t your family excuse you? Probably, there are problems with grandmothers.
Basil: Not really. I've never had any problems with my grandmothers; they love me.
Edward: It's good to have cabbage, by the way, where do you store it?
Basil: In the bank.
Edward: That’s right, it’s safer, now there are so many assholes who are greedy for other people’s greenery.
Basil: Yes Yes! We had one such goat!
Edward: Why was it?
Basil: Yes, my father and I killed him.
Edward: How did you score?
Basil: So, they slaughtered it for meat.
Edward(scared): For meat? What a family!
Basil: Look, this line never seems to end. I’m already hungry, maybe we should go somewhere?
Edward(hysterical): No! No need! Not me! Save!
Edward runs away. Vasily, perplexed, remains alone at the back of the queue.
Basil: And how do they recruit such psychos into the army?
8. Sketch - monologue for February 23 for schoolchildren - "Insidious dating site"
(a high school student comes on stage, sits down at his laptop and at the same time talks on the phone with a friend)
Voice behind the scenes: It's no secret that schoolchildren are now the owners and creators of many websites, some have this as a hobby, some are making their first attempts to start a business... A skit about the misfortune of a dating site administrator.
Hello, well, I made a dating site, but no one goes...
- What am I doing? Every day I go and look - no one registers...
- Why add it yourself? And then people will immediately come to the site? Will they meet? You're talking business...
- Well, okay, let me try... Here I am writing, strong, muscular, handsome...
- What photo should I add?
- Love?
- I added a photo of Tarzan
- Let be?
- And here... I added... a girl... here's the link, look (pretends to send)
- Yes, I don’t know who it is....
- What about Peskov in a concert costume?
- Well, okay, I’ll add...
- Look, look! Someone came to the site and wrote something...
- Wow, he wants to meet... me.. (is reading) I'm Paris Hilton - added a photo...
- Now I’ll write that I liked him too... and let him also tell about himself...
- That writes?
- He writes why there are so many mistakes in every word that I had in Russian...
- I told him that Russian is bad...
- It’s noticeable - he writes that there are several mistakes in each word...
- I wrote to him that this is how to meet American women...
- Oh, look, someone else is writing...
- The girl is writing.
- That writes? He writes that I’m some kind of stunted... but it was written by a handsome, muscular man... but it’s not my fault, maybe the photo shows Tarzan as a child?
- I still read one message and that’s it...
- There is a military man in the photo... who does he want to meet there...
- WAAAAH!
- What is it, he writes, waiting for me at the military registration and enlistment office for a medical examination, in the spring for the army.
- No, I’m happy, I just didn’t expect that via the Internet... they would... send me... a summons...
Articles on the topic
